Friday, 11 May 2012

Once an abuser always an abuser

Welcome back to my story.

Carrying on from where I left, after the visit with my aunt to her boyfriend, I thought that was the end of the relationship. The way she was slapped I never thought we were even going to stay another night. I was wrong. On our way back I asked her what she had done to deserve such a beating. Her answer was disappointing.
''It is my fault Abbie, dont worry about these things. He is a nice man''

''Really? What exactly did you do to him?'', I said surprised.
As a kid I had seen my parents row but never was my mother beaten. So I was surprised by my aunt's reaction.
My aunt made me swear not to tell my mother about the beating. I agreed and she promised she would visit the boyfirend again with me. I was not happy about that. I just did not like her boyfriend at all. He had tried to be nice to me but all I could think of was how he slapped my aunt.

When we got home I was quite. My mother quickly concluded that something was wrong.

''How was your journey Abbie?'', my mother asked.

''Fine'', I said.

''Surely it should be more than fine'', mum insisted.

''I do not want to talk about it'', I said.

A piercing look from my aunt told me I should shut upso I left the room.
I was still disturbed and wanted to talk to somebody. Eventually I told my mother about my aunt 's beating.

My mother was concerned.

''You don't have to put up with an abusive boyfriend you know'', mum said.

''Who said he was abusive?'' my aunt said.

''Well you know Abbie told me. If he beats you now he will still be doing that when you get married.What is it that you had done to deserve that? No good man can beat a wife or girlfriend. That is not a good sign.Leave this man alone,'' Mum said.

My aunt would not listen. A few months later,she went back to visit the boyfriend. This time I didn't go with her. I was scared.

Days later my aunt came back with a swollen lip. She lied to mum that she fell. We all knew what had happened.

They say, ''It is useless to warn one who has made up his mind''. My aunt had made up her mind and each time the violence occured,gifts would follow. She didn't realise what was happening but we all did.

''Do you think this beating will stop?'' mum asked.

''There is no beating.You are imagining things'', my aunt said.

A couple of months later, my aunt eloped. She was pregnant and they were getting married.

We were happy for her but mum was worried about the violence. Throughout her pregnancy,my aunt visited  us with scars on different parts of her body. Each time it was either a fall or some accident which was all lies.

If only she had listened. Once an abuser always an abuser.

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